12 Things That Ruined Superman

Superman is the original superhero , and he ’s still one of the most iconic heroes in any genre . But even though everybody hump Superman , everybody also talks abouthow heavily he is to get good . you’re able to practically hear the wheel - and - pulley auditory sensation of everybody lowering their expectation for Man of Steel . That ’s not just the basic construct — it ’s also a result of some weird decisions that have been made over the years . As prolific Superman artist Jon Bogdanovesays , “ Superman has jumped lots of shark over the years . ”

Here are 12 thing that have ruined Superman everlastingly . *

– Or at least , for a little while . Or a little bit .

As wads of people have point out , Superman bug out out as just a really great athlete . He could move really fast , he was massively unassailable , and he could “ jump tall buildings in a undivided bound . ” But finally , that was n’t enough for people , and he had to start exerting the might of anti - solemnity . He had to become essentially indestructible , and able to spud heat rays out of his eyes . And then why not have him be able to flee through space ? At faster - than - visible light fastness ? By the time you get to The Earth Stealers , he ’s towing the planet Earth around in space . WTF . Even when you seek to depower Superman slightly so he ’s no longer at “ planet towing ” floor , we all still gestate him to be essentially a daemon .

Both the comedian with that title , and the overall construct where Lois is constantly examine to flim-flam Superman into marrying her , and he ’s constantly doing dickish thing to embarrass her . In fact , the whole “ super - dickery ” thing kind of ruined the Man of Steel , but the Lois Lane stuff is often where the risky of it happens . Like Superman using his heat visual sense to burn the joint Lois is cook for him , so as to abash her and ruin their particular date . That kind of dickishness clings to the character , making it hard to like Supes . He also had horrendously nonadaptive relationships with his “ best friend ” Jimmy Olsen and the rest of his supporting mold .

Okay so you ’ve got Superman pilot and zooming through space and snap hotness beams out of his eyes . nifty , that all makes sense . But over the ten , the writers see fit to charge him up with more and more great power , including super - ventriloquy and superintendent - hypnosis . Until you reach the point where he ’s able to read an full book on a microdot in a few seconds , and super - con the whole thing . The movies picked up on this “ Superman has whatever powers we feel like giving him ” ethos , and take it to a whole new point — allow him bend prison term backwards by fly around the man . And throw his “ S ” cuticle and have it turn into a monumental cellophane trap . And kissing Lois and throw her amnesia , otherwise known as the super - roofie - kiss .

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In the seventies , the cartoon strip writer make up one’s mind that Clark being a newspaper reporter was wearisome and old - school — did n’t they watch Lou Grant ? — and determine to “ further ” Clark to become a newscaster at the local TV post , WGBS . Meaning a span things : 1 ) Clark ’s face was being circularise to one thousand , possibly even tens of K , of people every day , making the already - ludicrous “ hush-hush identity operator ” thing even hard to swallow . 2 ) Instead of dodge out in the middle of doing newsman stuff and nonsense to change to Superman , Clark kept having to run out in the midsection of a newscast . Which might be the sort of thing people would mark . Judging fromMichael Eury ’s volume The Krypton Companion , tons of veteran Superman writer sense as though this is the status quo change that came closest to wreck the character .

Superman III is rightly mocked , and has furnish many joyfully afflictive screencaps over the twelvemonth . In typeface you missed it , Richard Pryor is a supercomputer genius , and he builds a doomsday computer — but meanwhile Superman is too busy getting inebriated and being malevolent . His evil side is comically unshaved , like a cartoon hobo , and his idea of being “ evil ” is straightening the Leaning Tower of Pisa , and knocking over a nestling ’s ice pick . Hedoes cause an oil spill , too . It ’s kind of sad that Superman ’s variation of Star Trek ’s “ The Enemy Within ” is so weak . And then there ’s the low - budget , piece - together - from - scraps Superman IV . The Superman film went from fantastic to pathetic in an surprisingly inadequate fourth dimension .

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you may quibble with lots of things about John Byrne ’s reboot of Superman — like , for example , the whimsey that Clark was never Superboy — but most of his option were at least valid and in the help of making the character more believable and strand . But then there ’s Sleez . Who ’s the one Darkseid minion who makes Granny Goodness and Glorious Godfrey look well - rounded by compare . Sleez mind - control Superman and Big Barda into making a erotica movie together , proving that porn actually is Superman ’s Kryptonite . That , in turn , means there ’s an in - continuity Superman sexuality tape floating around in the DC Universe .

Really , all you need to do is look on this fanvid starring Elijah Wood , which explain the whole thing . What ’s really distressing is when , recently , Batman secernate Superman “ the last sentence you inspired anybody was when you died . ” I take on that what cricket bat really stand for was , “ the last metre you trade a bazillion comics and spawned a speculator feeding fury . ” Because the last affair Superman ’s mortal clout - up with a demon was , was inspirational . They just punch each other to death . And neither of them in reality dies . To this 24-hour interval , though , I ’m still a bit wobbly on how Superman comes back from the dead — I have it off it has to do with Pa Kent receive a meat attack and visiting him in the Kryptonian afterlife . Also terrible : the four substitution Supermen . Also , Batman seems really loll around about Superman ’s death — but where was Batman when Doomsday was very slowly plug his way across America ? Batman belike has an anti - Doomsday plan somewhere in his utility smash .

Sure his hair looks o.k. now , but we can never unsee the mullet . The mullet , of course , eventually led to Superman becomingan electric - blue characterwhose powers were “ electrical energy ” and “ blueness . ” As Batman observe in the JLA comic , when they told Superman to lose the fearful haircut , they did n’t really want him to go that far .

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Many people will credibly argue for The Adventures of Lois & Clark belong on this list — but even though Lois & Clark was oft awful , it did n’t weaken the musical theme of Superman , in a durable fashion , the way Smallville arguably has . If Clark Kent never wears his famous trash in Zack Snyder ’s Man of Steel movie , it will be Smallville ’s fault . Smallville start out as a Dawson ’s Creek - y soap about Teen Superman , and it was o.k. as far as that snuff it . If it had live on four or five class , it would have play . But when you go on for ten seasons and keep ramping up the comic - book factor , until Clark is skirt by hoi polloi in gaudy costume , and he still has n’t put on the suit?You start out to fall behind the integrity of the charactera bit . The secret identity is definitely never fit to put to work . There ’s a ground they never showed him put on the suit in the final episode — nobody would have believe it .

talk of undermining the integrity of the theatrical role … This movie turn down the bar to the point where Zack Snyder can slouch over it . You should just go and readthis takedownby Star Trek / Buffy / Supernatural source Keith R.A. DeCandido in its entirety — it ’s brusque . To quote from DeCandido :

Superman leaving Earth for five years is just one big WTF . Leaving everything behind without saying anything to Lois or anyone just does n’t make any sense … Superman II finish with Superman see to it the President of the United States that he ’d never rent him down again , and then we ’re supposed to consider that our hero then buggered off for five twelvemonth , in substance breaking his promise to the drawing card of the free world . [ Also ] , there ’s something seriously wrong with your Superman movie when the type who roleplay creepy and unpleasant and scary and stalker - like is Superman .

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The sad matter is , Brandon Routh is pretty heavy .

There have been various endeavor to make Superman “ relevant ” or “ political ” in late years , all of which seemed smell - deaf . Like , Superman walking across America , which I still do n’t get the peak of . Does n’t Superman have better things to do than walk around the country ? Little tiddler are fail in car collapse and fire , while Superman is walking and talking . Then there ’s the much - ballyhooed affair where Superman announces he ’s giving up his U.S. citizenship — which , did Superman have a Social Security Number ? is Clark still a U.S. citizen ? Has this ever been reference again ? — and this caused a firestorm on Fox News . And then , more recently , Superman quit his newspaper publisher job — nicety of WGBS — to become a blogger . Because bloggers are cool and pelvic arch , and they ’re the future , and he ’s the Man of Tomorrow .

All of a sudden , Clark and Diana are an item , and Clark has never go out Lois . Much like have Lucifer annul Spider - Man ’s marriage , this feels like a whole step backward for the part , and a wasted retcon . Of course , it ’s former days and possibly the Supes / Wondy relationship will turn out to wow us all . But for now , it seems like a mistake — not least because of the same reason that having Superman walk across America might have seemed like an okay idea : Superman needs to be grounded . When you ’ve got a character who can juggle black cakehole while memorise every book ever written , you hump , it ’s not a bad idea for him to have strong relationships with average man .

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